Fathers Day

July 2014

Another first is behind us. I expected Fathers Day to be a hard day, in fact I was dreading it and not sure exactly how I was going to handle it all. Again, God planned it totally different then I expected.
 The boys and I went to PA on Friday to attend a reunion on Sat. on Jonathan's Mother's side. It's one of those gatherings that happen like once in 8 years or something like that. It had been planned for months and was an event that Jonathan would have considered very important to go to. I kind of always knew that I was going until the week before I was having a lot of mixed feelings and suddenly was trying to figure out why I was going. Because I couldn't come up with a really good reason to stay home, I went. It was a bittersweet day, but I was glad I attended. The boys and I started home soon after 5, knowing full well that we had 7 hours of driving ahead of us.Well, that is where plans got messed up. We were on the road 2 hours when a message appeared on the dash and while we were trying to figure out what it was all about, all the gauge neeedles went down to zero. We pulled off the road and shut it off and it would not start again!! I could not believe this was happening to us because we just bought another vehicle almost 3 weeks ago precisely because I was afraid that very thing would happen with the old suburban. This was not supposed to happen to this Acadia! But it did. And I have also given this vehicle the shorter name of Cadi [Katy] Ok there we were 5 miles south of Carlisle on I81 and the weather was nasty....pouring down rain, thundering and lightening, and windy .AAA to the rescue again but his time I was more frustrated with the lack of better service. It took 1 hour and 30 minutes to get a tow truck out and we called the police for some assistance and they never showed up. I thought with that weather it would have felt better to have blue lights blinking behind us for safety reasons but that was not to be. The boys thought we could fake a heart attack or something serious to get them out there!!
 We decided to have it taken to Uncle Reubens at Port Royal and let all the smart guys in that area check it out, since I could get a hundred miles of free towing. So we all decided to sleep at there house too because by now it was 9 o'clock or later and the desire to travel home had diminished. Marty, our favorite friend and cousin who has come to our rescue many many times in the past 2 years and also when Jonathan was sick 11 years ago, came to our rescue again. She was also traveling home from the same reunion and drove out of her way to pick us up and give us a ride to her house. There were 5 of us to hop into her little car with her and believe me our hip bones were rubbing each other!! So we arrived at her house just 15 minutes after Cadi got there, because we had stopped to eat at Arby's.On Sunday morning the men around there looked at her but they couldn't locate the problem so we brought Marty's car home and they are taking it to a garage to get it fixed. Marty is coming down in  2 weeks and will bring Cadi back assuming of course that she is fixed by then.
 So Father's Day was spent, first of all dealing with vehicle issues and then traveling home. If God thought that it was best to distract me, well I guess it worked. I have no idea what He is trying to teach  me tho' and that is a bit unsettling. If He is reminding me that I am not in control, well I am very aware of that already so I kinda don't think its that. I had prayed hard asking God for direction in buying the right vehicle and I just don't really think that He let me down so I pretty much do not know what this glitch is all about. Hopefully she can get fixed and be everything I thought she was.
 We arrived home safely Sunday evening at 5:30 pm. and there were several beautiful flower arrangements here to greet us as well as a framed poem that a friend had written recognizing our pain. It is beautiful! Thanks Carolyn! I am so impressed with the kindness of our friends.
 The garden is growing with leaps and bounds, including the weeds. I spent most of today out there and got 2 results. A better looking garden and a very tired me. It has been a long time since I worked so hard and felt so exhausted from physical work.
 I have been really struggling in that area the past several weeks. My energy is really slow in coming and my ability to really accomplish anything is almost gone. It has been a very real trial for me. Yet I am told that grief will exhaust a person even more then physical work and I have found that to be so true and also discouraging. I am discontent with the person I have become and so powerless to change. Many times I beg God to give me the energy to do the things I need to get done.I have full confidence that God will answer that prayer but it does seem to be in His time and not mine. Life is going on and we miss him like crazy. Fathers day will never be the same again.